A girl’s view on zoning as seen through the eyes of my good friend/sister, Toyin Aribike. We are not entirely in agreement but hey everyone has a right to be heard, enjoy!
A lot of things have been said on this particular topic. It is singularly one of the most popular topics on social networks today. Yes I’m talking about zoning; everybody says it’s a bad
thing and girls are being blamed for this particular phenomenon.
According to the urban dictionary it is a state of being where a male inadvertently becomes a ‘platonic friend’ of an attractive female who he was trying to initiate a romantic relationship.
Females have been rumored to arrive in the Friend Zone, but reports are unsubstantiated.
Girl: “I love you (Insert the poor bastard’s name here,) but I don’t want to
ruin a great friendship by dating you.”
Guy: “Well why the f*** did I waste two months on you?”
The truth about the matter is everybody has zoned someone at a particular time in their lives so let’s stop playing the blame game and stop pointing fingers at girls.
As a girl I admit zoning is bad but sometimes it has to happen, there are times when u meet this wonderful guy that is so easy to talk to… after a few weeks of talking u realize there are no feelings involved, you genuinely just enjoy his company and don’t want to lose this particular friendship. At this point a sister has to zone, it’s not our fault but there is nothing she can do about it.
There are definitely girls that take this zoning thing too far and I’ll use the segun and omololu story as an example: the writer took it too far and she got what she deserved in the end, I’m
very sure she knew she didn’t have feelings for segun but his gifts were too awesome so she led him on. She was obviously going to keep him as back-up just in case she didn’t find a suitable husband after a certain period, maybe then the Holy Spirit would tell her to marry segun. Don’t get me wrong I’m a Christian and I believe in praying before making such an important decision but trust me if he was the guy for her she would have received the go-ahead.
There are also guys who deliberately zone themselves without the girl in question knowing and then later they’ll claim that they were zoned, I’m going to use the story of someone I know.
Let’s call the guy Lanre and the babe oyinkan. Lanre and oyinkan meet, sparks fly and both start ‘catching feelings’, oyinkan flirts shamelessly while becoming good friends with lanre and he does nothing about it.
About a year later they go to a party together where oyinkan meets another dude and starts talking to him, lanre becomes jealous and oyinkan tries to find out where the jealousy is coming from and Lanre claims it’s because he thinks the new guy is a player he still doesn’t say anything about his feelings for her, he decides to wait another year before finally fessing up about his feelings but she had moved on by then. Though they are still friends it’s a strained relationship because he claims she zoned him and it was obviously his fault. There are also people that have been put in the zone by circumstances like bad timing…people in this situation hope that one day they’ll magically find their way to one another just like in the movies but in the meantime they become ‘besties’. They are genuinely best of friends and most of the time don’t even understand the ‘chemistry’ or ‘sparks’ other people can see.
I’m going to end by saying even if you have been zoned you can always leave this zone, all you have to do is talk to the person in question whether male/female the worst thing they’ll say is NO, and even then I’m very sure you won’t die…nobody will even fault you
if you stop talking to the person, you’ll only be called immature by some people, which I guess is a small price to pay